Hi Lola, thanks for your reply.
Actually I wasn´t saying this jealousy was a positive thing, I just mentioned it as an indication of what he´s like with me.

Also, I thought this forum was about the principles in Mimi Tanner´s books? She doesn´t advice being manipulative at all, it´s more about not running after a guy you´re interested in, but letting him take the initiative. So that´s what I was referring to, I´m not trying to be dishonest at all, or pretend anything.

As for being honest with him, we did talk about things between us and he told me he liked to take it slow. I´m okay with that, not really looking for a husband or whatever, but it does seem strange to me that we haven´t had more physical contact than kissing in all these months. (It does seem awkward to me to take the initiative myself in that matter, and not because of those "principles" but because it makes me shy and I´d feel rejected if he objects.)

Of course you´re right that people are very different when you get to know them in a relationship. One thing that strikes me is that he likes to fantasize about scenarios in which jealousy plays a role - like him looking on while other guys look longingly at me (in a club or bar or whatever), or him looking while some girl tries to seduce me (I´ve told him I don´t like women so it´s all his thing). There is always this element of jealousy that turns him on, somehow, and at the same time makes him reject me if he thinks I´m turned on by someone else. So yeah, it´s pretty weird. I´ve tried to let him see it´s not healthy and he does understand that, but I think it´s a deep seated issue because he always comes back to the same thing.