I have been seeing a for about 2 and a half years now, and am so confused! He is 65, I am 54.
We I started seeing him, He was quick to tell me that he was seeing another, and that was fine, he was upfront from the start, so I thought. We would get together once a month is so, it was always so wonderful, he was always so romantic, and he just won my heart. But at a point he stopped calling to see me, but would still call to see how I was doing.
I truly didnt know the extent of his relationship with the other lady, until about a year and a half ago, when she was diagnosed with breast cancer, and died rather suddenly.
The day she died he called, and we talked about her for hours, I at that point found out that he had been seeing her for four years, and the last six months of her life or so they had become really close, and were planning on being married. She was a widow, with a huge monthly income, and no children, and that they had traveled all over the country together. She was going to sell her home and move in to his home, they would pool the money and retire together and travel the world.
The first three months after her death, we spent a lot of time together, he had some projects that they were working on together, and I stepped into help, shortly after the projects we completed, he stopped calling, and then one day the phone rang, it was him asking to see me, it started out we would see each other weekly, then in September, it became twice a week, In November, we went to a party and when we came home, as I was getting ready to leave, he asked me to stay the night, But he used the term, That is if you dont have another boy friend, I quickly answer, No, But would you like me too, and he responded with no, I wouldnt, at that point, we started seeing each other more often, I have now been introduced to the entire family. And have been accepted as his girlfriend.
My confusion comes from the fact that he has never said how he truly feels, after all this time, I still cant get him to talk about us I asked a few weeks back where I stood in the relationship and all I got was you stand, and a smile with a laugh,
He still talks to other women, he tells me this when I am not around, they call and go visit, there is one that use to come around, when I was there, but has now stopped doing that, she will only visit when I am at work.
I now spend every evening at his place, I get off of work, go to my apartment, take a bath and head to his place, I get up in the morning, go home, get dressed and go to work, this is repeated daily, he gets upset when I am late getting to his place, But, he hasnt even offered the use of his washer, I have clothes to wash and an apartment to keep up even though I dont spend very much time there, you might say I have a very expensive Clothes Closet you would think after all this time, that he would ask me to give up my place, since he wants me at his so much , We eat together, sleep in the same bed, sex, is not an issue, its very rare! and do what ever he needs to do together. he is always talking about money, and looking for ways to make a couple extra dollars, That 1500.00 a month, I spend could go towards the expenses at his place. Not to mention the additional funds, that I make to help with the meals and such.
I feel that I am there for the time being, until he can find someone that has a ton of money and Ill be history. How do I deal with this?
He wants me, But doesn't want me? I'm confused!
We I started seeing him, He was quick to tell me that he was seeing another, and that was fine, he was upfront from the start, so I thought. We would get together once a month is so, it was always so wonderful, he was always so romantic, and he just won my heart. But at a point he stopped calling to see me, but would still call to see how I was doing.
I truly didnt know the extent of his relationship with the other lady, until about a year and a half ago, when she was diagnosed with breast cancer, and died rather suddenly.
The day she died he called, and we talked about her for hours, I at that point found out that he had been seeing her for four years, and the last six months of her life or so they had become really close, and were planning on being married. She was a widow, with a huge monthly income, and no children, and that they had traveled all over the country together. She was going to sell her home and move in to his home, they would pool the money and retire together and travel the world.
The first three months after her death, we spent a lot of time together, he had some projects that they were working on together, and I stepped into help, shortly after the projects we completed, he stopped calling, and then one day the phone rang, it was him asking to see me, it started out we would see each other weekly, then in September, it became twice a week, In November, we went to a party and when we came home, as I was getting ready to leave, he asked me to stay the night, But he used the term, That is if you dont have another boy friend, I quickly answer, No, But would you like me too, and he responded with no, I wouldnt, at that point, we started seeing each other more often, I have now been introduced to the entire family. And have been accepted as his girlfriend.
My confusion comes from the fact that he has never said how he truly feels, after all this time, I still cant get him to talk about us I asked a few weeks back where I stood in the relationship and all I got was you stand, and a smile with a laugh,
He still talks to other women, he tells me this when I am not around, they call and go visit, there is one that use to come around, when I was there, but has now stopped doing that, she will only visit when I am at work.
I now spend every evening at his place, I get off of work, go to my apartment, take a bath and head to his place, I get up in the morning, go home, get dressed and go to work, this is repeated daily, he gets upset when I am late getting to his place, But, he hasnt even offered the use of his washer, I have clothes to wash and an apartment to keep up even though I dont spend very much time there, you might say I have a very expensive Clothes Closet you would think after all this time, that he would ask me to give up my place, since he wants me at his so much , We eat together, sleep in the same bed, sex, is not an issue, its very rare! and do what ever he needs to do together. he is always talking about money, and looking for ways to make a couple extra dollars, That 1500.00 a month, I spend could go towards the expenses at his place. Not to mention the additional funds, that I make to help with the meals and such.
I feel that I am there for the time being, until he can find someone that has a ton of money and Ill be history. How do I deal with this?
He wants me, But doesn't want me? I'm confused!
