I have been having a relationship with a married man for over a year. I have had a rough year as I have lost my relationship with my family and daughter, my job, my friends, and moved into a scary neighborhood. My lover was the last thing I had that was famiiar. He sent me a letter the other day saying we shouldn't see each other anymore. He was trying to be a better man and decided to be faithful to his wife and practice integrity. That is all good I guess but I can't help but feel a loss. He was my first lover in over a decade. I have met many guys online and had the one date and never heard from them again. I have met a guy who I have went out with twice and he is nice and everything, but his is cheap. He should have a good income but he lives in a small apartment and when he took me out, I got one item and a drink off the value menue. We went to a amusement park (a free admission one) and rode no rides and we were there from 3-8 pm and we had no dinner although there were alot of nice restaraunts there. I can't help but want a man who is a little generous and I hate cheap dates. It is hard to get over my loss when I can't find a single man who I like as well as my married lover. I will probably go out with this guy again but can't help but feel cheated as our dates are very long (6 or more hours and I get kinda bored sitting and watching people walk by (no matter where we go, we end up doing this) and I just about starve. My ex lover wants me to keep in touch and I want to do this but I can't help but miss the imtimacy of our relationship as this new guy I met just doens't turn me on.



